And judged we shall be. Because instead of, “I understand, kids have strong opinions and need help calming down,” we get, “your kids are out of control, what the hell kind of parent ALLOWS their child to act that way?”
Um, the same kind of parent who doesn’t believe that a child having a tantrum is a reflection on them; that a tantrum is the expression of an unmet need or desire or a way to regulate their emotions. Children aren’t bad. They need help and they needn’t be afraid to express that. They’re allowed to be pissed the fuck off about not getting twelve bags of marshmallows.
Let’s be honest here, I’m upset that I can’t eat twelve bags of marshmallows too. I just have more impulse control.
And If we want our children to talk to us about the big things when they get older, we have to listen to why they are concerned about the little things today. Because while we may not understand why the blue sippy cup is more important than the pink, or the marshmallows are more critical than dinner, to your child, these are the big things, and they carry these patterns into their older years. To them, these have always been big things.
Perspective, people. It matters.